First appears in S5E4 — Chaos in Chinchilla Forest — Tormiir v Granny Edith. Appears in 3 episodes.
Deathmatch record
| Episode | Played by | Result |
|---|---|---|
| S5E4 — Chaos in Chinchilla Forest — Tormiir v Granny Edith | Cucumber | none. Both champions die from a fifth fatigue in the final exchange. |
| S5E16, Chaos Royal (Season 5 finale), the first Chaos Royale (four-way) | which handle plays which champion is not stated) | Copycat and the Hunger (fused) |
Appearances
S5E4 — Chaos in Chinchilla Forest — Tormiir v Granny Edith
(Cucumber). A minotaur warlock (“I don’t talk about it a lot”).
- Looks: purple jumpsuit, gold bangles and bands on his horns, neck, arms and ankles. Purple magic spills from all of his (27) orifices.
- Powers: warlock blasts from his snout, eyes, ears and mouth. Signature move: a purple beam charged between his horns (“Kamuhamuha wave”).
- Weapon: a brass sword, turned into an onyx blade by the Box of Chaos (destroyed on a nat 1).
- Milk: drinks his mother’s milk, kept in bottles, an emergency stash in a hidden sporran, and a portal of udders. Rages at anyone else drinking milk or eating cheese, though he admits he loves cheese and milk himself.
- History: says he has only ever killed warriors, never an old lady. “On the range my whole life… everywhere and nowhere.” Accent drifts, finally Scottish.
- Death: a gluten allergy / celiac disease. Loves morning grass and petrichor. Died beside Granny.
S5E16, Chaos Royal (Season 5 finale), the first Chaos Royale (four-way)
(guest). “The great minotaur,” a muscle-bound warlock-type.
- Powers and gear:
- Purple crackling magic channelled through his horns; it is “magical electricity,” so lightning grounds through him harmlessly.
- A two-handed greatsword that returns to his hand. He lit it by licking it with his tongue.
- Body: greases and shaves daily, with gorilla-pattern hair.
- Personality and lore:
- Fiercely protective of cow’s milk as sacred and maternal; hates seeing Acolytes drink it.
- Devoted to his mother, who would “jump through a portal again” to nurse him if he were dying.
- Hints he “paid for college” with something lewd (“Only cows”).
- The Acolytes wear Tormiir t-shirts.
- In this episode: wanted the mug for his mama “so she could drink out of it. Water.” Allied with Richard late. Fell to the Hunger’s bite on his mother. His ghost watched from a bench and became part of the felted friend.
S7E4 — The Cheese — Sila v Ol’ Pumpernicklejack
a dead minotaur champion whose decomposed, barely-trousered body lies in a Midnight Mausoleum grave. The name is uncertain; see Continuity.